When I was riding to SF, I had a goal and there was nothing that anyone could do that could change the fact that I was going to achieve that goal. I remember I rode along the skyline for a pretty long time and had a lot of time to reflect, although during that time I got to solve some pretty cool programming problems and I got to take some pictures and see a lot of people riding the other way and also passing me.
I remember 6 years ago the guy passing me and then I tried to catch up to him but then he was already gone, turning the corner and giving me a hand signal. Or that time I was trying to cross the sidewalk and the guy gave me a huge bad time while cursing me out and saying I was trying to get myself killed.
Watching the superbowl I am pretty sure I vividly remember one of teh teacher’s during lunch saying patriots or giants because it was New York vs New England and that stood out in my mind. Also the kids having to stay on the wall because they all got in trouble was a pretty strange sight to behold.
Understanding what is good about a place and what is bad is really important, when we were in Newtown a lot of things seemed great at the time and they definetely were. But there is only so much I can do about it now and the fact of the matter is I can probably never go back there for the forseeable future. I have to plan ahead and have a plan B and really try to focus on getting a job that I will enjoy having. Becoming a research intern?
Recall and Procrastination
Currently the procrastination that I always exhibit is just absolutely insane. It should never be the case that I am putting off assignments or not being on top of my game but for some reason, there are some times when I just can’t seem to do what I need to do and get things done that I need to get done which is extremely frustrating. The time to do good is now and I need to start literally right now. But I believe, slowly but surely I will get everything that I need to get done. I know that I have what it takes. Remembering my time in Greenwich, it is defenintely a place for lots of white rich people but I should have appreciated it for what it was back when I lived there. Now I just need to focus on documenting my time there and even in the present moment as well, because there is so much that I need to get done and I know that I will be able to get everything done in time
I recall the kids in 5th grade, whether it was the spanish kids or others telling me about Garden Catering and which type of food I should get there so eventually I got my mother to get something from there. We got the chicken and potatoe cones which was pretty good although now that I think of it I really should have been more aggressive during that time and tried to think for myself. But even now I need to start thinking for myself and trying to understand what exactly I want to accomplish.
- Nonformal learning and combined approaches
- Reading directions helps a player learn the patterns that solve the Rubik’s Cube
- Practicing the moves repeatedly helps build “muscle memory” and speed.
- Thinking critically about moves helps find shortcuts, which speeds future attempts.
- Observing the Rubik’s Cube’s six colors help anchor solutions in the mind.
- Revisiting the cube occasionally helps retain the skill.
I am going to skip all those random english voodoo bullshit and keep thinking. I remember the soccer and basketball activities I did while in Greenwich. Looking back, those were actually pretty important in formulating who I am now but there is still a lot to keep in mind. Just because something has passed doesn’t mean that I can’t look back on it and even though I have so many regrets, I just have to keep moving forward and pushing myself to a place that I have never been to before. There are some things that I can control but others I cannot, I just need to find a way to power through and find out what I find important.
Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash
Comparing myself to others is one of the silliest things that I could do and I cannot believe I did not figure this out sooner but I need to learn exactly what it is that I want and then achieve it. Don’t worry about the days going by. 4 and 7 and the nice ways that time is divided based off the seasons and the format of USACO is cool but dont’ worry about the lost time and the time that I didn’t spend typing and learning. THe time to get better is now and I can do it. Lot sof learning on wikipedia but I could probably learn a thing or too from the go documentation and also rust and swift. After all, if I want to work for those companies that is something I am going to have to suck up and learn.
I think the biggest things that I achieve from my time in Newtown, Greenwich and Hartsdale is the memories. Learning which parts of those places shaped my memories and just being motivated by what happened on each of the days that I was there. In 2015 we visited so many different colleges and 2012 and 2013 were pretty important years as well. In 2016, Maybe we went to new york and 2019 new years we went to SF. I also went to SF with my friends in 2023 and hopefully this year as well too. In 2022, I stayed home and tried to understand some USACO problems while being in bed near the windows facing the pool. That was fun. I believe it was range reconstruction and other problems I was struggling on . Not exactly sure what happend in 2021. But on july 4th 2024 I went to the Baylands with Marc and celebrated the fourth of july with some crazy fireworks.
Just trying to remember those days during the pandemic, that was a long summer and trying to recall what exactly happened to me on those days. I still remember the first days of school during senior year, that was one of the most painful times of my life and I can enver forget those days. Also being in the groups in analysis class was horrible as well.
One of my main criticisms of that school is the fact taht I feel I was never treated respectfully or that I was cared about it was like I was just tossed over and I was just a dirtbag people could poop on. Now I have to take action and make sure that never happens to me once I have a job.
Sing like no one’s listening, love like you’ve never been hurt, dance like nobody’s watching, and live like it’s heaven on earth.
I think it is tough to realize that I need to write but it is something that I am glad that I am finally doing. With writing, I can actualize my thoughts and even if they are trash in the moment, eventually they will become a lot better and something that I can look back on in 20 or 40 years and remember with fondness. It is important and something I wish english class had taught me.
parting shots
I was not treated well but some of my closest friends either but I got to deal with the bad parts just as much as I envy the good parts. I really appreciate that my computer works, and with this computer I believe that I can do great things that will set me apart and put me in a great place to suceed. 2/11/2023 and the weeks leading up to it when I was searching on the web about how to code. The following semester and the very first day when I met Tim Hsu and got to learn all different types of mathematics and then playing through Zelda Breath of the Wild and what else? Doing well in CS 146 and my various talks with David Taylor were fun.
After coming back home, and having some of the most ridiculous fights ever with a crazy mom who has never really done anything to support me was something that shows that I absolutely need to get a job and although I don’t enjoy writing is something that I need to put into writing to show how serious it is.
I will continue to write with consistency and get my domain to match and post it to github and also post various coding tutorials once I am actually good, posting regularly youtube videos and also code like crazy to have a crazy github that will attract so many potential job recruiters.
